I am pleased to report that for the time being, Rob and I have called a truce. He still thinks I should not be dating and still feels like it’s okay for him to have opinions about my personal life, I admit that I agree that dating is not a good idea right now, but I resent him trying to tell me what I can and can’t do. He’s not in my personal life anymore, so as far as I’m concerned he doesn’t get a vote. The truce has been called because Beth and John are coming to meet us.

Beth and I have been emailing back and forth, and right up until the morning that we were actually going to meet I was purely excited, but at the last minute nerves kicked in. I started running through “what if’s”  – What if they don’t like me? What if they see the strained relationship between myself and Rob and it scares them off?  What if… I don’t know I had about a dozen fears that ran through my mind over and over again and they all lead to me and the baby being rejected by Beth and John.  I had worked myself into quite a state,  and then standing at the hostess stand I saw them and all the “what if’s” went away.

There is a connection between birth parents and adoptive parents that it so hard to put into words. From the moment I first held that profile in my hands and looked at the pictures I felt a connection with Beth and John, that connection had been getting stronger through the phone call and the many many emails that we had exchanged, so meeting Beth and John in person was like meeting friends. We smiled awkwardly for a minute but almost immediately the awkwardness dissolved and we were hugging and Beth and I were laughing about how nervous we had both been.

The three of us were seated (Rob was meeting us there and apparently running late) and Beth and John gave me a gift – a picture frame with paw prints for a picture of Ben and a squeaky bone! I was touched by their thoughtfulness. We talked about the baby, they asked how I was feeling. I told them about the napping, the strange cravings, the “morning sickness” – some of it was stories that I had told Beth in email, but of course in person the stories are much funnier. Rob joined us while we were talking, and they asked him about his job, where he grew up, etc. We were all talking, trading stories about how we met, talking about things we liked and things we don’t like. It was so much fun!

It was a long lingering lunch, and at the end Beth asked if she could take a picture of Rob and I together and I was proud that Rob and I managed to graciously sit next to each other and smile for the camera.

As we parted ways, I thought about how lucky I was to have Beth and John in my life, how much peace of mind that they gave me. I knew that the baby would be safe and happy in their arms, loved unconditionally. They gave me strength. What an incredible blessing!

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